Notes: This is set to the tune of "Love Potion Number Nine", which is really not my fault since for some ungodly reason my radio is only picking up the oldies station tonight.
"Xander, I really hope you had a good reason for what you did."
"Of course I do, Buffy."
"Then I'd sure like to hear it, 'cause apart from demon possession I can't think of any reason why you'd do...*that*!"
"Wait, Xand, where's that music coming from-?"
"I took my problems down to Amy, (eww)
You, know, the witchie with the blond hair, too.
"Her locker's down by the cheerleading tryout sign,
Where she's selling little bottles of, Love Potion Number Nine.
"I told her that I was a flop with chicks,
I've been that way since nineteen-ninety-six.
"She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign,
Said 'What you need is, Love Potion Number Nine'.
"She bent down, turned around, and gave me a jab,
She said, 'I'm gonna make it up right here in Chem lab.'
"It smelled like turpentine and tasted like Balthazar dip,
I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a sip.
"I didn't know if it was day or night,
I started kissing everything in sight.
"But when I kissed Snyder down by the hot lunch take out sign,
He broke my little bottle of, Love Potion Number Nine."
"Xander, are you ever going to learn not to meddle with love spells? No matter how catchy your musical number might be, the next time it might be even worse than kissing Snyder!"
"And such a thing would be...?"